In my experience, one of the most frustrating challenges about living with a mental illness is that the seemingly small things in life are often the most difficult. Take a first date, for example… or just trying to get a first date. She lives with bipolar II, schizoaffective disorder, and complex post-traumatic-stress disorder. When everything is uncertain and depends on how the chemicals in your brain are interacting with each other, the equation of trying to balance life with a mental illness is a messy one. That goes for both love and relationships. While there is yet to be a dating manual for mentally ill folks, we can guide each other. I was fortunate to speak with several brave women who are open about their mental health.
Dating Someone with a Mental Illness
A mental illness. And online dating? They are not able to see you or your personality. And I am not my illness.
The person with a mental illness may feel shame, embarrassment, or guilt about their condition. They may try to hide their symptoms or fail to seek.
Depression and anxiety are difficult — and, at times, debilitating — conditions. While everyone encounters obstacles throughout the course of their romances, they can put a heavy strain on your relationship. These mental illnesses may affect how your partner thinks, feels, and behaves. It can be incredibly painful to watch them struggle and hard to know how to help them cope.
Doing some research about these disorders, their symptoms, and their effects can make them less abstract and scary, as well as much easier to deal with in your relationship. As you do research, be sure to talk with your partner about their personal experiences. Try not to assume that something will be true for them just because you read about it or because it is a common occurrence with others. Remember that your partner is the most knowledgeable resource when it comes to their own mental health.
Additionally, you need to be aware of the relationship challenges posed by both depression and anxiety. For example, if your partner is diagnosed with depression, they could have a tendency to self-isolate or push their loved ones away; on the other hand, if they have an anxiety diagnosis, they might be hypersensitive to criticism, rejection, or other perceived slights. Of course, these types of behaviors can vary greatly from person to person, and your partner may react in their own distinct way.
Above all else, you should try not to take it personally when your partner behaves strangely due to their mental illness. It could be that they need a shoulder to cry on or some time alone, but they may also need a fun distraction or some encouragement to get their mind off of things.
6 Tips for Dating Someone with a Mental Illness
When did you know you were dating someone with a mental illness? It may have started like this: You met the most amazing person. You have been on a few dates, and the chemistry is there. It’s exciting, and it’s going so well. And then one night you have a deep conversation and you learn that you’re dating someone with a mental illness. What now?
New research reveals people in England would rather date someone they weren’t attracted to than date someone with a mental illness; social.
If you are currently dating someone with bipolar disorder , you may struggle with a number of challenges like how you can support him or her while still caring for yourself. Knowledge is power, so learn as much as you can about your partner’s disease. This will also be a healthy sign to him or her that you care. That being said, bipolar disorder is a complex disease.
Try not to get too bogged down in the details. For more mental health resources, see our National Helpline Database. It is important when you are dating someone with bipolar disorder to recognize that their disease is a piece of their life pie, and not their whole identity. With that, you do have to learn to love the whole package, so to speak. Whether or not you are dating someone with bipolar disorder, it’s important to discuss major topics, when you are both ready.
For instance, if you really want children but the person you are dating does not, this may be a deal-breaker.
What You Should Know About Dating Someone With A Mental Health Problem
The saying that true love knows no bounds is absolutely correct — and those that suffer from mental conditions have every right in the world to the same happiness and fulfilment that those without such illnesses enjoy. There is still a certain social stigma that stems from the topic of dating someone with a mental health illness, but those that find themselves attracted to someone already in the process of handling such an issue can still find happiness in spite of all odds.
Behind every person with a mental health illness is someone that deserves love, kindness, and respect. The problem is that there can be a lot of misunderstandings between someone with a mental health issue and someone without that issue — those misunderstandings can often lead to deeper problems that lead to painful breakups.
For one thing, it is very likely that you will at least go on a date with someone who is suffering or has suffered from mental health problems. After all, 1 in 10 people.
Dating is hard enough as it is. What about his or her mental health history? Still, here are a few suggestions for how to try to make it work with a significant other who is struggling, or how to let them go. It is just another part of his or her identity. It is another layer that you must now decide whether or not you can not only tolerate, but accept and live with. Buckle your seat belt.
Unlucky In Love? Try Dating With A Mental Illness
Any Lab Test Now. You can get tested for issues in just a few minutes at Any Lab Test Now and have the results emailed to you within 48 issues. This is the micronutrient testing lab Tim used to uncover his site deficiency he used Brazil nuts to ask it. Vitamin B-Complex Caps. This covers all of your bases for the DATE vitamins. These issues are free from common allergens, like boyfriend, tomorrow, barley, wheat, and lactose.
It’s mental because it’s a illness of emotional response to an unpalatable deed done to us. Where the difference is between someone who is emotionally stable.
A reminder that this article from our magazine Visions was published more than 1 year ago. It is here for reference only. Some information in it may no longer be current. It also represents the point of the view of the author only. See the author box at the bottom of the article for more about the contributor. This oversight is in part due to the traditional practice of mental health professionals focusing on symptoms within the individual, and overlooking the patterns of how individuals relate to each other in a couple relationship.
At times, both partners in a relationship can be struggling with symptoms that have developed as a result of the original illness in one of the partners.
8 Tips for Dating Someone With Depression or Anxiety
The stigma and shame surrounding mental illness takes a toll on family members, making it difficult to find support when someone you love has mental illness. Here are five ways we can love someone with mental illness and still love ourselves :. For resources on teens and mental health, click KidsHealth.
Encourage and model self-care and wellness.
Be Patient and Understanding.
Or in a crisis , text “NAMI” to Donate Now. Here are a few quick insights from us, a husband and wife who have navigated these rough waters together for several years. Embrace empathy and validation. And yet when it comes to matters of the brain, we have adopted the sentiment that grit will get us through—despite our national suicide rate being higher than our homicide rate.
What do we do when we see someone having an asthma attack? We act fast, we supply them with medication when needed, we give them adequate time and treatment and room to breathe, and we teach them the skills to properly take care of themselves and their affliction. Mental illnesses are scientific, physiological illnesses and need to be treated as such in order for wellness to be achieved. Learn the symptoms and then stop taking them personally.
Each mental illness, like all illnesses, has its own specific set of symptoms that manifests in heightened seasons of struggle, and an important part of being supportive is understanding how those symptoms affect our loved ones. For instance, a person with an anxiety disorder may have difficulty concentrating, or feel fatigued and restless; those things may lead to irritability and agitation. Someone with post-traumatic stress disorder may have a hard time staying in the present or have negative changes in their current belief systems; they may feel confused and afraid by flashbacks and memory loss.
When To Tell Someone About Your Mental Illness
February 13, Today, Trevor talks candidly about the difficulty his mental illnesses can cause in his dating life. Then we talk to Kirsten W. She also recalls a patient struggling with the thought of sharing their mental illness diagnosis with a romantic partner.
Dating Someone With A Mental Illness Can Be Hard, But This Guy On Reddit Totally Nailed It. Tell Me About It: I feel very isolated and alone most of the time.
But if she’s depressed or has a crappy home life, you have the chance to be one of the few good things in her life and she’ll like you more. This anonymous internet nice guy goes on to explain that he has a real thing for girls with mental illnesses like anxiety and depression. You see, their mental health works in his favor! This white knight can stride in on his big shiny horse and rescue them from the depths of their own minds.
He is there to save them from themselves, for that is his gift: He is a special man with a real passion for manipulating women. If you’ve had a long-term mental illness, you might be aware of the kind of men who look to women to satisfy their white knight fantasy. If you haven’t, you only need to look to the internet for proof: Scour forums, and you’ll find male teens asking questions like, “Why do I think suicidal girls are hot?
There was even a study conducted in by researchers at the University of Texas at Austin that found, in general, men are more likely to go after you if you look “psychologically vulnerable”—but only for short-term involvement. So what do you do when you find yourself trapped with a partner who thinks your illness is the most attractive thing about you? The problem, of course, is that these relationships don’t tend to start as transparently as that.
At the beginning, the attention paid to your mental illness might well be reassuring; finding someone who will openly say your depression is “fascinating” can almost seem like a relief—it’s a sign they won’t ignore you when you’re sad or leave you because of something you can’t control. In the beginning, I saw it as someone accepting me for who I am, flaws and all.